I really just wrote this for my own sanity (and not for public viewing), but then I figured what the hell. So, for what it's worth...
MEMO TO ALL DUDES: Regardless of whatever you have built up in your head about me (and females in general), if you were to ask me on a date I would not shortly thereafter be expecting a princess cut diamond ring and your hand in marriage. In fact, just to prove my point, it doesn’t even have to be a date. What I (and I speak for many other females) am asking for is a conversation. We can freaking sit next to the drunk guy on my front steps for half an hour for all I care. So before you get ahead of yourself thinking I’m already naming our unborn children, I will spare you the guessing game. I’m not asking for much here: maybe just how many siblings you have or how work is going or what you like to do when you’re not working. When you don’t ask us out due to your pre-conceived notions of what a “date” means to us, you, in fact are guilty of the exact same thing of which you accuse. There is definitely a verse somewhere in the Bible about that.
MEMO TO ALL DUDETTES: If you think you may be interested in a guy (which may happen on numerous occasions) please be real with yourself about the source and intensity of the attraction. Chances are you know very little about him….that he’s cute, he’s from such and such city, works for such and such company and seems to have some kind of sense of humor judging from the sarcastic comment he muttered under his breath the other day. Sounds simple enough, but the problem is that us girls love to play pretend in our heads….it’s like some crazy internal wiring we have going on that makes us really good at relationships but can also get us into a whole lot of trouble. So even though you want to assume he’d be a great father one day because he talked to the little boy in the elevator….don’t go there. Just don’t. I know it’s hard because it’s against our very nature, but guys can sniff this out from a mile away and they freak out and refuse to initiate any sort of hang-out or activity that could possibly be labeled as a “date”. My advice: be cool….even when your insides are screaming otherwise….be cool. Then guys won’t feel the pressure that tends to lead to their general withdraw from the female population.
